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Text Game Part 1
We're in an age where most of the phone communication with women you're seducing, dating or in a serious relationship with will be via texting rather than talking on the phone. Text game is a big enough topic to warrant several posts, so this will be the first post in a series on effective text game. A huge percentage of my successful online game and open/poly relationship game is done via texting, since I almost never talk to women over the phone. It's just become so second-nature to me I never really think about it.
-By Caleb Jones
The Core Frames To Have -
Effective texting means you are always maintain the same frame in your texts that you (should) have in your real-life pickup, seduction, and relationship interactions. That boils down to four things:
If you constantly remember those four things when texting chicks and always have your texts reflect those things, your text game will never sabotage you. Your goal is to maintain those four frames especially when she does not. Here are some examples of what I mean.
Her: You said you'd be here at 5pm and it's 5:10 wtf???
You: I had to stop and order a pizza. You're not getting any though. I ate it all.
Her: Um, who's that other girl on Facebook who commented about your Seattle trip?
You: Another girl on my Facebook? Does she have big boobs? Mmmmm.
Her: I've really thought alot about this and I just don't think I can be with you any more. Larry really treats me like a lady I and guess I need his stability right now. I really care for you and think you're a great guy and I really wanted to move forward with you but you seem unwilling to do that.
You: Ok (then ignore her response)
Her: You know Wednesday's my birthday and I really liked those earrings I saw at Nordstrom's that one time.
You: Hey that's a good idea, you should totally buy yourself those earrings for your birthday! Treat yourself baby you deserve it.
You can see in all of the above examples where most normal men would respond with logic, explanations, defensiveness, or even anger. All of those things are really bad, especially over texts where things like voice, body language, and physical aura are completely absent.
Watch The Sarcasm -
Notice I said "Funny", but not "Cocky and Funny". It took me a long time to figure this out, but sarcasm does NOT translate well over texts, even if you are normally a sarcastic guy and she understands that. Unless you are very verbally skilled and have the four frames above as rock-solid, I would avoid being sarcastic over texts until you feel you really have it down. Be funny. Be witty. Just don't be sarcastic. If you choose to be sarcastic over texting, do so sparingly and always, always end your sarcastic statements with smiley faces (just like in the first example above).
If you have not yet had sex with the woman at least twice yet, I would REALLY avoid the sarcasm until you lock her in by fucking her twice. Then you can relax, a little. Even with women you have ongoing relationships with you need to really watch text sarcasm. I'm a very sarcastic son of a bitch and years ago when I was figuring all this out I did indeed lose potential lays because of sarcasm over texts.
A common piece of advice is to respond to a woman's tests as fast as she responds to yours. If she takes 20 minutes to respond to you, you wait 20 minutes before responding back to her. I suppose I agree with this advice in principle, but only to a point. Some women will really take a LONG fucking time to respond to your tests. With some of those damn 18 and 19 year-olds you'll be waiting an entire day or two for a response sometimes. Some of those hard-working 29 year-olds will often go all day long without responding. You send her a text at 10:00am, and you get your response at 8:30pm that evening.
Once you actually do get a response from her, I don't think purposely waiting around to respond to her just to show her you're Mr. Cool McBadass is a very effective strategy. Don't play games. Receive her text, wait a few minutes, and then just text her back. Responding to her sooner rather than later is actually more effective since you know A) she still has her phone in her hand, B) she's available to text, and C) she's in a "texting mood". Nothing wrong with that at all. I do it all the time and it works well.
That's it for now. I'll post more text game advice over the next few weeks. More to come.
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Hawk 2011-08-05 08:08:26
Can you go into detail on things like, how many texts before you set up meeting, to sending x's or not, etc
Blackdragon 2011-08-06 12:40:15
Sure. I'll include that in the next text game post.
N 2011-08-07 00:33:56
Loved the post... the example txts were hilarious. Just one thing: > Don’t play games. Receive her text, wait a few minutes, and then just text her back. This has absolutely not been my experience and I've done both - replying within a few minutes or replying within a similar time as it took her. The latter was (for me at least) vastly more effective. I generally go by the 2/3rd rule (credit to.... I've forgotten who. Not me.) Send her 2 texts for every three she sends you. If she takes two hours to reply, you take three. For every three compliments she gives you, you give two. And so on. Simple hard and fast rule to maintaining consistent non-neediness frame. (except for orgasms obviously. Fucking shower her in those. Be generous in bed, stingy with real money)
Blackdragon 2011-08-07 11:34:37
Like I said, the "wait as long as she does" technique is valid and you should do it...when it's feasible. Sometimes it isn't.
bogspua 2011-08-10 06:00:43
Great post and finally some good advice on the text game. Looking forward for part 2
Santo 2012-06-02 21:03:28
@N..the advise is from Shark...solve my girl problem blog..and i fully agree with Sahrk on this issue than blackdragon...
wolfgang 2012-12-04 12:14:36
I think if you're always waiting longer than her to text back she'll assume you're trying be Mr Cool McBadass. I usually mix it up with good results - sometimes responding in 5 minutes, sometimes an hour - preferably because I'm actually busy doing shit. If not then I'll manufacture the time gaps. If she gives bad answers I wait longer to respond.
Squanto 2013-03-31 14:38:07
Do you feel ANY women in the modern world are capable of just NOT texting, other than very direct (i.e., directional), to-the-point (or point-to-point), i.e. basically non-conversational texting. I mean, HOW the human race (or just the real benefitors of men's technology, women) has regressed to consider that an effective form of conversation, where is the Hydrogen bomb.
Blackdragon 2013-04-03 10:15:39
Sure, there are some women who are direct over texts. Most are not, especially during the initial phases.
big Daddy cool 2016-08-17 08:16:13
Her: You said you’d be here at 5pm and it’s 5:10 wtf??? You: I had to stop and order a pizza. You’re not getting any though. I ate it all.Or: Dear, I am afraid my watch is slow and has got way more than 10 minutes behind. You'll have to wait a little more.
Her: I’ve really thought alot about this and I just don’t think I can be with you any more. Larry really treats me like a lady I and guess I need his stability right now. I really care for you and think you’re a great guy and I really wanted to move forward with you but you seem unwilling to do that. You: Ok (then ignore her response)Or: Larry may suit you way better than I do. You should have given him a chance already, think I. (then ignore her response. And, later, have fun, occasionally, telling her what a bad boy you are and what a good guy Larry is. I think Larry would suit you better, dear. Why you don't...) It may be a little egotistic, but I have enjoyed the startled look on a woman's face. (P.S.: Make sure Larry is a beta). ------------------ So, well, I enjoy sarcasm, and I think it's good for screening, but even afterwards. It's just me and my way.
I’m a very sarcastic son of a bitch and years ago when I was figuring all this out I did indeed lose potential lays because of sarcasm over texts.Sure enough, if the wanted outcome is to mount as many femals as possible, sarcasm will be no help and straight humour is the way to go. Sarcasm is the reverse of flattery, so, aside from the backhanded compliment setting, it hardly helps. But then again, I can't keep from it. -------------
A common piece of advice is to respond to a woman’s tests as fast as she responds to yours. If she takes 20 minutes to respond to you, you wait 20 minutes before responding back to her.Not in the least. She has to wait at least a 50% longer time on average. And sometimes much more. We are talking of flirting and fucking, not real love here. The more they wait, the more they wet. (But as we know, even real love will take longer to fade away, with this kind of attitude).
big Daddy cool 2016-08-17 08:31:07
Responding to her sooner rather than later is actually more effective since you know A) she still has her phone in her hand, B) she’s available to text, and C) she’s in a “texting mood”. Nothing wrong with that at all. I do it all the time and it works well.Well, you have me surprised here. Many forms of submissiveness "work well", but I don't see you encourage people that way usually. I can reply very quick to a message it took her half or a full day to send, I can even send 3 or 4 on a row, but then I'll take 2 days, or 3 to reply. I mean, I alternate in an apparently random fashion, so to give the impression that it's all casual, but at the same time, on average, make her wait quite more than she makes me wait. And of course there's also the random time I totally forget to reply... and she has to send a further text for our conversation to go on.
Camille 2017-12-25 12:57:11
Receive her text, wait a few minutes, and then just text her back. Responding to her sooner rather than later is actually more effective since you know A) she still has her phone in her hand, B) she’s available to text, and C) she’s in a “texting mood”. Nothing wrong with that at all. I do it all the time and it works well.Yup!