Interracial Dating

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Interracial Dating

-By Caleb Jones

I am a white American guy. This is the racial breakdown of the last seven women I've had sex within the last few months:
  • 2 Asians
  • 1 Russian
  • 1 Latina
  • 3 American whites

So just taking the last seven into account as a snapshot of my sexual current events, more than 50% of the women are outside my nationality, and 43% are different races.

I'm not "into Asians" or "into Latinas" like some white dudes are, so I don't do this on purpose. Nor am I one of those "white women hating men" America has been producing lately. Actually quite the opposite; big-boobed blonde barbies are my all-time favorite and always will be. That being said, I don't care about race. If she's hot and doesn't give me drama, I'll have sex with her. Then I'll categorize her later.

I could care less what race she is. Hotness and lack of drama matters to me, not race. Hell, the entire concept of racism or racial preferences is societal programming at it worst, and in the modern era has nothing to do with reality anyway.

Today is just some random thoughts and observations on different interracial combinations in terms of dating, seduction, sex, and relationships.

1. Asian men pursuing white women.

Asian guys have no problem dating Asian women, of course, and that's a good thing, since Asian women are often also considered high-value to white men as well. White guys also seem to have no trouble dating Asian women. But Asian dudes going after white women does seem to be a big sticking point for a lot of Asian men.

The trouble Asian guys come up against when pursuing white chicks is the Asian perception among western whites, that is, that Asian men are considered weak, non-masculine, and a little nerdy. I'll double down on this and state that many white women also tend to find Asian men spastic, hyper, and silly.

BUT HERE'S THE DEAL. I have seen first-hand what happens when an Asian guy goes out of his way to offset this wimpy image. Whenever I've seen Asian dudes hit the gym and get muscular, or join the military and walk around in combat uniform, these guys pull white chicks with no problem. I've seen this happen with multiple guys, multiple times. It's almost as if when an Asian guy gets muscular and puts on a masculine demeanor, he becomes more attractive to white women than typical white men.

For example, I've heard some white women tell me about how "hot" muscular Asian guys are because they don't have any body hair (unlike those hairy white bastards like me).

As much as I hate to give the overly-simple advice of "go get buff, then you'll pull chicks", I have to admit this does seem to work for the Asian dudes going after white gals. (Frankly, it will work no matter what your race is. Muscles are good.)

2. Black men pursuing white women

Okay, now this is a completely different thing than the Asian guy / white woman situation. Black men, by and large, already are more masculine than white guys. Compared to black men, it's us white crackers that often look like pussies and nerds. However, this is both a blessing and a curse. Black guys often go too far with it, and often intimidate and repel white women away from them.

I can tell you for a fact that a huge number of white women either have a secret "black man fantasy" or would be perfectly willing to date (or fuck) a black guy as long as he didn't walk up to her on the street with a "DAAAAYYYUUMMM gurl! You got dat phat AAAAAYYYUSSSSS!" type approach. And yes, many white women would never fuck a black guy, that's very true, but just like when I talk about dating much younger women, you need to ignore these women fast and quickly move on to the next. Always put in the numbers!

One of the few types of men who I've seen out-success me in my seduction life are well-dressed, relaxed black men. When black guys dial it down a little, they are the smoothest, coolest, best-seducing motherfuckers on the planet. In many ways I'm jealous. (Shit, I'd love to be able to shave my head and still look good.) My son is black, and if he had a higher sex drive, more Alpha personality, dude, he would clean up.

Essentially I'm saying this: If you're an Asian guy trying to get with white girls, jack UP the masculinity. If you're a black guy trying the same, dial it DOWN.

3. White men pursuing Asian women

As I mentioned above, this is usually pretty easy. Asian women are definitely in my target market and any time I'm on an online first date with an Asian chick, she's looking at me with longing doe eyes and a lay is in the bag. Even if she was born and raised in the United States. It's like I have Asian chick pheromones or something. I'm a big masculine white man and I guess many Asian women are dying to fuck a man like this.

That being said, there are some pitfalls with Asian gals. Unlike us westerners, Asians are highly communal and complete slaves to their families. Asian women almost always have major relationship problems with their Needy Alpha fathers. Shame is a huge and significant ingrained component of Asian culture, far more than white folks understand. Because of all this societal programming, you need to be aware that when an Asian girl is considering you, she's thinking more about how her friends and family will react than a white woman would be, even if she doesn't intend on anything serious with you. Be aware of this. It's huge.

4. White men pursuing black women

I can't speak to this since I have never had sex with a 100% black woman. And believe me, I've tried. Pardon me while I go cry in the corner. Hey, I have had sex with a few half-black/half-white women, and a few half-black/half-Asian women, but that's not the same thing. (OMG! Can I talk about how fucking hot as hell those half-black/half-Asians are? Holy shit! One of the few "tens" I've ever had sex with in my life was a black/Asian mix...highly recommend!)

So if you're a suburban white cracka-ass like me trying to make it with a sista, I can't help you. Sorry. The few white guys I know who have fucked many black chicks tend to live in the southern United States where black women are more plentiful, so maybe that has something to do with it.

5. Black men pursuing Asian women

This is another tough one. I don't know if you've noticed, but Asians tend to be extremely racist against blacks, far more than white people are. (Side note. I once saw a stand-up comic from India state that the greatest trick the world pulled off was convincing white people that they're the most racist race, when in fact if you actually look at the world, Asians, blacks, Arabs, Indians, etc are far more racist than the typical white person. Pretty funny.

I've been around the world myself and I can't say I disagree.)  Asian gals are going to either be repulsed by black men (unless the Asian gal is clearly overweight), or secretly turned on, in which case they may fuck you, but they're not going to walk down the street with you hand-in-hand.

The few serious Asian woman / black man couples I've known always include an Asian woman who has been very Americanized and is extremely brave, essentially because she has to stand up to her family, who likely hates what she's doing. Sadly, standing up to family is not something Asians do well. (The reasons for that are long and complicated. It all goes back to Confucius. Gotta love that societal programming!)

That's it for the moment. If I had more time, I could probably do an entire post on just the different kinds of Asian interracial relationships (like Chinese dating Vietnamese, Japanese dating a Korean, etc), but that would be from my standpoint, an American white, so it would probably be better if an Asian PUA guy wrote up that one instead. 🙂

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This article was originally published on August 19, 2012


  • Socialkenny 2012-08-19 11:52:10

    I've never f-closed a white chic in my life(although I game them regularly). I've also never banged an Asian,but that's more out of preference as I don't find them sexy attractive.

  • Blackdragon 2012-08-19 12:23:14

    Yeah, I've often thought about if black guys successfully getting with white women is more a construct of social circle game rather than cold approach.

  • Socialkenny 2012-08-19 12:28:36

    Perfect statement!!! You know what's ironic about what you just said,a lot of ppl would disagree. But I always wondered why the fuck do I as an advanced PUA have troble f-closing white girls. I do #-close them and the usual as with any other races and nationalities. But it almost aways fizzles out before a meet up or date or whatever. I always thought my Game was the problem until you just enlightened me that most black dudes who bang white girls are done primarily through social circle game and mutual friends. You enlightened me lol. Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

  • Alejandro 2012-08-19 12:55:24

    I don't like the lack of latinos in this post.... :S Would you say latinos are like more similar to white men? Or maybe behaviourally more like black men? What I can tell you is that latinas are, at least for american and european guys, relativelly easy. They are also very family-oriented and will throw A LOT of drama at you during the relationship. A lot!

  • Devin 2012-08-19 19:43:45

    I agree with alejandro, I wanna know more about laying latinas. Im white but my favorite ladies are latin. Any tips?

  • Socialkenny 2012-08-19 19:51:25

    Devin-Laying Latinas is no different than laying white and black girls. I wrote an article on this a while back about learning new language in order to lay girls of other nationalities. I'm fluent in Spanish(I learned it).I've lain more Latinas than any other nationality except blacks. The key to laying them was that I connected with them and impressed them with my knowledge of the Spanish language. I used to blow guys out the set. For instance,I'd be at a bar,a Latina and some non-Spanish speaker will be talking at the counter.Part of my pickup technique would to approach the bar as if to buy a drink then say something in Spanish to the target.That non-Spanish speaking guy will instantly lose as he knows he cannot compete with a guy who can connect in Spanish. I do this a lot to guys and just watch as they squirm as the chic gets drawn into me. Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

  • Socialkenny 2012-08-19 19:52:33

    @Devin-P.S.Now I'm not saying you need to learn Spanish in order to pick up Latinas,but you will have an 80% advantage on any other guy who doesn't know any Spanish Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

  • Socialkenny 2012-08-19 20:00:54

    @Devin-P.S. You don't have to learn the whole Spanish dictionary neither. It's just to know few common words in Spanish:girl,boy,money,car,pretty,hot,talk,name,have,go ,come,eat,etc.So you don't have to become fluent.Just know a basic 20 words(verbs and nouns)that will impress Latinas. And when I say impress,I'm obviously not speaking from a Beta-Male point of view which is to kiss ass and impress. But it's a huge DHV(Demonstration of High Value),and will impress the girl. Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

  • Blackdragon 2012-08-19 22:21:16

    Latinas! I don't know what I was smoking because I completely forgot about them even though I mentioned that I laid one recently (OMG she was so hot!) Kenny is spot-on about knowing a little Spanish. Other guys-who-love-Latinas have reported to me the exact same thing. Alejandro is also VERY spot-on about the drama. Speaking generally, Latina chicks are huge tornadoes of hardcore drama...much worse than white women, even worse than black women, and that's saying something. Are there exceptions? Sure. But generally speaking if you actually get into an ongoing relationship with a Latina, even if it's just an FB, you need to expect drama and shit tests like you've never seen in your life. It's just part of the program. And whether or not she was born and raised in a western country will make no damn difference. Latinas = drama. Period. Another problem - Latina chicks love getting pregnant. They hate condoms with a passion. They will want your cum inside them. Even if you just met them. It's because of a mixture of love of family, hardcore Christian religion, and their superstitious belief in fate. Beware! That being said, sex with Latinas is fucking fantastic, and in my opinion Latinas kiss better than any other race. The very first time I made out with a Latina years ago I couldn't believe how amazing it was. White women and Asians are so bad at kissing, Latinas are a very welcome change. Hot! I'm going to agree with Kenny again and say that if you're a white dude (or I guess a black dude) there is no real "key" to getting with Latina chicks other than the Spanish thing plus the typical stuff that works on all women (confidence, outcome independence, not falling into her frame, etc.)

  • Socialkenny 2012-08-19 22:44:23

    Thanks for the co-sign. And you're spot on correct with all the social and sexual points you laid out about Latinas. I never fucked one with a condom neither. Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

  • livingastro2011 2012-08-20 06:51:06

    "Yeah, I’ve often thought about if black guys successfully getting with white women is more a construct of social circle game rather than cold approach." but like you were sort of saying, a well-dressed, well-spoken black guy can score no matter what. I am black, and pretty much the vast majority of my dates/lays/casual relationships are from white women that I've either met online or going out twice a week. But then again, I live in NYC and pretty much everybody fucks everybody around here. And with that said, I still to this day don't approach a lot of Asian/Indian girls, it's usually a total waste of effort. I used to roll with this 6'3" well-built Asian guy and I've seen him clean up at the bar a few times. Height is a huge factor with Asian guys too.

  • Socialkenny 2012-08-20 07:13:58

    @Livingastro-You don't have to be well-spoken and well dressed,especially when it comes to gaming girls online like POF and other sites. I'm an NYC cat too,so I get what you mean. I just never really games white chics in the city.But as you paraphrased,social circle game and having white chics in that circle is a faster way to lay white girls(as a black dude like I am). Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

  • Jon 2012-08-25 08:25:17

    When black guys dial it down a little, they are the smoothest, coolest, best-seducing motherfuckers on the planet.
    That's true. Lucky for us that black guys tend to go for the more substantial white women. I thought it was hilarious when Chris Rock pointed out that white girls don't even need to own a scale. They know their gaining weight when black guys start hitting on them. 🙂

  • Socialkenny 2012-08-25 08:27:25

    @Jon Lmao hilarious but true Chris Rock quote Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

  • Superman 2012-09-03 08:01:23

    True about Black guys and White girls and Asian girls. Cold approach is a lot harder to get them than social circle or lifestyle game.

  • Chris 2014-06-13 23:18:34

    That Chris Rock quote up above is hilarious. I think I'm in the minority of black men that has a preference for petite women. Though I'll date a girl that's pleasantly thick any time. Only problem with "thick" girls is that it's just a matter of time before they turn into FAT girls. As for the topic at hand, I think this is one of the best posts I've ever read on the subject(as it applies to black men gaming white or Asian girls): It's funny how many guys think black dudes have it easy when it's actually the opposite.

  • J 2015-05-15 13:59:20

    Interesting you have never been able to lay a black woman, Dragon. There is a certain type of black woman that is one my biggest target markets. These women all date white guys almost exclusively. FWIW I am early 30s,  tall, highly introverted and intelligent, thin but relatively athletic build, and a pretty boy face.

  • Al 2015-11-26 11:36:25

    Hey BD,  your son is black but you're never been with a black woman? Confused :-/ Al

  • Blackdragon 2015-11-26 12:02:59

    I adopted him. He was biologically from his mom, who is white.

  • Anthony 2015-11-30 05:00:01

    Try being a black guy in South Korea. Believe me when I tell you, it can be a tremendous gift AND curse. The curse is from the older generation (60 & up).

  • TS 2015-12-31 16:01:41

    hey nice website by the way. I think you pretty much nailed it with the interracial scene. I think when a man is rich, fit, has tight connections, options, he has less worrying about his race. I think many guys are scared of being rejected for their race but I say give it a try. You never know what a girls are into until you present yourself to them.   Also you say you are white here but you have black son? Is he adopted? Just curious.

  • Blackdragon 2015-12-31 16:54:08

    Also you say you are white here but you have black son? Is he adopted? Just curious.
    Yeah. He was my ex-wife's biological son (she's white).

  • CTV 2016-07-10 17:44:10

    As a White guy I love Asian and Latina girls. I disagree on the Asian girls not liking Black guys they sure do. I think Black guys can do some real damage with Asian and White girls if they have an image more like Billy Brown. Yes I have seen a buff military officer Asian guy with a lot of tattoos for an officer who had an insane physique with a very good looking White girl as his wife. Yes this is def the way to go for the Asian dudes. I've heard from some chicks that the cultural barrier kills it for them. So if they're attuned to white culture norms to they can most def get white chicks.

  • Niteride Mick 2017-02-10 00:55:42

    Asian blokes are big its a myth that there all small and weedy Look at the Japan Imperial Guard from WW2 6ft and over Look at Bruce Lee Thousand blokes would kill to have a body like his !!! Cheers

  • hollywood 2017-12-12 09:01:01

    I am a very white man and my best success "pulling" is black women.  I may be a little stereotypical here, but in this case I am generalizing and I realize that. First off, it is a problem with my game.  I do night game mostly with some day game.  No online game.  My game is weak, and I am not good with a cold approach.  Therefore, I think I pull black women easiest because they are typically more outgoing than other races and they actually approach me.  Or as soon as I make eye contact with them, they give me a clear sign compared to for instance a white girl. Second, I do enjoy social aspects that are common with a larger portion of black culture.  For instance, two of my top music choices are rap and hip hop.  I also wear more sporty/athletic type of clothing and Nike/Jordan shoes.  Almost every black woman I have hit it off with, immediately commented about my J's.  Then when they talk to me, they can relate to me because I dabble in many of the same cultural aspects that they do as well. When in public with a black woman, I often have white men approach me and tell me about how they are jealous and have always wanted to date a black woman, but cannot make it happen.  Of course I always explain to them that the particular black woman I am with is not in a committed relationship with me and they are free to pursue, and they usually do even try right in front of me.  Of course they always fail.  I am told by the black women that white men are always nervous, jittery and intimidated by them and it really turns them off.  They've never given me their perspective on why I was different, so I could be wrong, but I believe it is that I have always had black people in my life while living in a highly white-dominated area and essentially, I know their nuances within a largely white population.  I know what bothers them about their white community they live in, and how to make them feel comfortable and at ease with me as a white person.  Essentially, the biggest reason I think I have the greatest success with black women is that I immediately put them at ease and make them comfortable, as well as being mysterious and intriguing since most other white people make them feel uncomfortable right off the bat. My advice for those seeking better numbers with black women, I would say you need to immerse yourself a little more in black culture.  You need to hang out with some black men to get that perspective as well.  Black and white is such a vast difference socially sometimes, that us white men come off as uncomfortable or intimidated right away, and giving off that vibe usually probably kills your chances with black women.

  • hollywood 2017-12-12 09:18:59

    Also I need to add that absolutely every black woman I've been with, I fucked her the same night I met her.  I have no evidence to back this up, but I think many black women lose respect for you if you don't go for it on the first meet.  Again being overly stereotypical here, black women are likely pushed for sex on the first meet much more often perhaps than other races, so in their mind, you might be more beta if you didn't go for it fast enough.

  • PK 2017-12-13 08:00:37

    @hollywood, Interesting observations, thanks for sharing.  I'm a white dude, been married to a black woman for almost 20 years.  Currently working to get separated, on the way to divorce.  I've only been with one black woman, my current wife, but I think a lot of what you say is true, esp the issue of white guys being too nervous/jittery in the presence of black women.  I think a lot of white guys only see black women as some exotic fantasy and not a real person.  If white guys would approach them with the same level of calm and OI as they would exhibit toward women of other races, they would do much better. I set up some online dating profiles to get a feel for "what's out there" once I finally separate.  It's striking how many black women "like/favorite" me or just flat-out cold approach me online.  I still like white women, too, but at least I know black chicks should be part of my target market :).

  • joelsuf 2017-12-14 09:06:42

    I'm aware that these responses may sound racist, but here goes...

    I think many black women lose respect for you if you don’t go for it on the first meet.
    They do. Most black chicks are hornier than most men. There's a good reason they have more STDs than other races. This isn't really an insult or anything, just stuff I've seen.
    Again being overly stereotypical here, black women are likely pushed for sex on the first meet much more often perhaps than other races
    Yeah its a sad fact. I think this is majorly due to (most) thirsty black men and boys who almost always have sex as an end goal. The very same scrub who belligerently hits on chicks will also attempt to white knight the pants off of her. Its quite funny to watch.

  • hollywood 2017-12-18 11:47:22

    I think a lot of white guys only see black women as some exotic fantasy and not a real person.  If white guys would approach them with the same level of calm and OI as they would exhibit toward women of other races, they would do much better.