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Why Women Lie To Themselves
I want you to watch the below video. It's one of the most educational videos on female behavior you'll ever see. But! Before you watch it, I want to make it clear that the topic of the video is not why the video itself is so educational. The topic is a beta male "house husband" who stays at home while his wife works (the couple has no children). I could write an entire article about that of course, but the behavior of the female commentator is much more educational and important.
-By Caleb Jones
Ecstatically excited, Anna spends five full minutes spewing all kinds of rational-sounding chick logic about how great it is for a Strong Independent Modern Woman™ to find a man who is a submissive beta male who sits around the house all day while obeying his stronger, higher-income female partner. "I love it and I support it!" she proudly exclaims, and gives reason after reason why this is a fantastic thing, and implying great problems with traditional gender roles. Again, I could discuss that, but that's not what was educational here...the truly educational stuff was yet to come.
The guy next to her brings up valid points why this is an insane position and how she herself would hate that, and she argues back, hard. Another woman on the set also chimes in and says she agrees...having a pussy husband sit on his ass all day while the woman worked would be awesome.
Finally, in exasperation, the guy basically says, "Your husband sitting at home all day while you're out working? You would eventually HATE THAT!"
In an instant 180-degree switcheroo, Anna says, in shock and embarrassment, "Ahhh! You're RIGHT!" She goes on to admit that her "number one turn-on" is ambition. "Someone who's driven and powerful, that turns me on so much," she finally admits, and then says about the stay-at-home husband, "For me, I would probably get tired of it pretty quickly."
Exactly, Sweetie. That's what we've been saying here for years.
I've said it before. I'll say it again...
Because of societal programming, women diligently pursue situations that will make them unhappy.
Notice how it took her five full minutes of arguing and bullshit before she finally broke down and admitted that what she was endorsing was the exact opposite of what she actually wanted. God damn this is maddening. Even more amazingly, at one point she even admits that society "programs people", namely about working hard. But she's completely oblivious the the fact that society also programs women to pursue beta males who will bore them to death and make them unhappy while looking down their noses at Alpha Males.
This video was so stunning, so telling, and frankly, very depressing. How many women have I met over the years, intelligent, mature, cool women, who are just as self-deluded as Anna? The answer is, a shitload of them.
Women who will not admit that what they're doing with their lives, and the men they choose to get serious with, are the exact type of situations and men that will end up making them extremely unhappy. Society, Hollywood, feminism, government, politics, and all of her female friends and family members are going to tell her she's supposed to want one thing, when in fact she really wants something completely the opposite.
It's already documented that a woman outearning her husband increases the odds of divorce by 50 percent. Gee, I wonder why? Maybe because low-income or unemployed men eventually turn women off big time, and yes, that includes all those those Strong Independent Modern Women™. Maybe not immediately (in the short term beta males can be very attractive to women, especially provider-hunters) but eventually. It might take six months or three years before a woman realizes she never wanted a guy like this in the fucking first place.
Sadly, too many women out there never realize they keep doing this to themselves, or if they do it's when they're in their late forties or fifties when it's far too late to do anything about it. What makes it worse is often these women are very smart, cool women who should know better.
How useless! How tragic! How destructive!
One of the few core concepts that umbrella everything I have ever talked about in all subject areas is the danger of societal programming. Societal programming does not make you happy. That's not its function. Its purpose is to get you to unwittingly conform to the agenda of the elites so they can more easily maintain power over you.
The only way, and I mean the only way to achieve long term, consistent happiness is to consciously and consistently resist societal programming. Yeah, people might look at you a little funny because you're not conforming, but you'll be consistently happy and they won't be. I will take consistent happiness over conformity any day. Sadly I'm in the minority.
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Jack 2013-02-21 16:48:15
SM 2013-02-21 17:31:57
Could it be argued that her turn-ons as well as "traditional gender roles" are the result of societal programming as well?
Austin 2013-02-21 17:38:04
@SM It's not a matter of societal programming, but of survival instinct. Back in the "paleo time", the strongest male, the one who took home the largest piece of meat, was the one that got to fuck all the women. Same with the gender roles, the only occupation of females back then was to produce offspring. Unfortunately, one women, obviously smarter than her peers, decided to turn the tables. Thus, societal programming was born.
Oxyjinn 2013-02-21 18:27:36
Refreshing and very rare that a woman actually admits it (to a man), Even more so that it's this public.
Oxyjinn 2013-02-21 18:29:35
@SM - how in the hell can a turn-on be the result of societal programming?
SM 2013-02-21 18:55:28
@Oxyjinn - the same way any other emotional response can be learned: conditioning.
infantry 2013-02-21 20:53:45
I've had a few girls admit the truth to me, but never in front of their friends. Good post re: societal conditioning. I'm amazed that people can go for ten years without asking themselves "what do I really want? Will doing this make me happy?" Madness.
AnotherDragon 2013-02-22 00:22:21
@Austin: "Back in the “paleo time”, the strongest male, the one who took home the largest piece of meat, was the one that got to fuck all the women." No. Back in paleo time, most men fucked most women, and vice versa. =) "the only occupation of females back then was to produce offspring" No. Females also gathered food, and probably gathered more food than the men. (they just didn't hunt).
yousowould 2013-02-22 02:55:04
This is beyond painful. The hamster is strong with this one. First of all, she provides a perfectly rational justification for one partner staying at home, and even admits that it is an important job, effectively nullifying decades of feminist moaning of being marginalised for being homemakers. She then displays a total and utter lack of awareness of how her own attraction cues are triggered, and performs mental gymnastics in an attempt to convince herself that if she actually met a guy on a date that said he was a "house dude", her loins wouldn't dry up faster than an ice cream in the Sahara. Truly, the illogicality and delusion of some women knows no bounds. I'm glad the UK has not yet fallen this far under the thrall of feminism.
Maldek 2013-02-22 05:13:48
Ok. This - was - hard. Really. Until minute 5 I was getting the feeling to be stupified every second. But then! This guy really cracked her open! What a genius home run. She couldnt hold it any longer and the truth broke free. Joy. Excitement. Body language. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet. BTW: I liked her, would give her a 9 (honesty on TV is a rare find)
Randian Hero 2013-02-22 10:24:31
AnotherDragon said "No. Back in paleo time, most men fucked most women, and vice versa. =)" No, this is wrong. What makes you believe this?
AnotherDragon 2013-02-22 10:29:56
Randian Hero, what makes you believe that was not the case? I don't claim to know what was going on back in ancient times but I can suggest reading Sex at Dawn. Extremely interesting read!
Austin 2013-02-22 11:23:13
@AnotherDragon I'm not sure if this topic has been touched in this blog, but male and female instincts are quite different: Male: Fuck as many women as possible in order to deliver the largest possible offspring. Female: Fuck the fittest and strongest male only in order to deliver the strongest and fittest offspring. I highly doubt women would fuck any wimp who crossed their path back then.
AnotherDragon 2013-02-22 13:26:54
Austin - How many wimps do you think there were around back then? In most (probably all) cultures people didn't understand exactly how babies came to be. In many cultures they believed that it was responsible by a woman to fuck as many men as possible, so that the offspring could get the great humor of man A, the great hunting skills of man B, the intelligence of man C etc. In some cultures you had the older women teaching the younger men to be good lovers, and vice versa, you would have swinger festivities and so on. Even the mainstream theory I assume you are referring to states that women are cheaters. When they ovulate, and see a hot man, they will have sex with him. And as I said, there weren't many beta males around because that is a result of dynamics that started much later in history. I don't know if this exact issue has been discussed before on this blog (maybe in that series of post where Blackdragon argued with a reader about whether non-monogamy would actually work on a larger scale in today's society), but doesn't this whole blog revolve around the fact that both men AND women aren't monogamous...?
lazy guy 2013-02-23 08:58:36
Great point about societal brainwashing BD. This is a huge, important topic. One example which I've been aware of is how advertising and other media bombard you with brainwashing to believe that happiness is found by being a passive spectator, fan, consumer (buy CDs, DVDs, beer, etc.) when really those things will never give you the excitement & satisfaction of DOING things and taking risks (pursue challenging goals, pursue women, etc.). Corporations can't make near as much money off you if you are more of a doer than a buyer/consumer. Another trend is the approval given to staying BUSY and constantly SOCIAL. By default/omission, we get the message that solitary contemplation has little value. You are less influenced by this cultural brainwashing if you rarely watch TV. It's unfortunate that living contrary to the widely embraced brainwashing makes you a non-conformist which makes 'the sheeple' respond to you with unease. Maldek makes a good point about the woman in the video deserving credit for realizing she's wrong and admitting it. Too bad that behavior is so rare!
Jon 2013-02-23 10:41:42
Some of my female friends on Facebook were circulating a meme recently that perpetuated the same kind of social conditioning: "We need to teach our daughter to appreciate a man who... [insert list of beta male qualities here] and we need to teach our sons to be that kind of man." It drove me nuts because girls will still be naturally attracted to the kind of boys mom warns them about, but boys will take their moms seriously and try to be the kind of guy women don't really want, and a bad time is had by all... 🙁 Knowing these women's dating histories made it especially frustrating because they were basically saying they want to teach their daughters to date the kind of guys they never dated (at least for long) and their sons to be the kind of guys they usually ignored.
Ron 2013-03-05 08:41:15
Why exactly does everyone here hate on Betas? As far as I can tell, the hatred for the Betas and, in turn, societal programming in general, is a result of the fleeting nature of sexual attraction that occurs between a female and male Beta. Is this correct? If the track record for relationships with females and Beta males lasted longer (i.e., more than 6 months to 3 or so years), would the perception of Betas be different?
Blackdragon 2013-03-05 16:22:22
Why exactly does everyone here hate on Betas?I don't hate them. I'm trying to help them. I was a beta once. The more betas that choose to become Alphas, the better. (Of course many betas want to be beta, so only a few will choose to improve.) Not to just pick on betas, the more Needy Alphas who choose to become full Alphas, the better. In my opinion of course. 🙂
As far as I can tell, the hatred for the Betas and, in turn, societal programming in general, is a result of the fleeting nature of sexual attraction that occurs between a female and male Beta. Is this correct?No. It's because of betas' insistence on doing things that make them routinely unhappy. (Clinging to women, obeying bitchy women, being needy with women, never wanting to risk anything, etc.)
If the track record for relationships with females and Beta males lasted longer (i.e., more than 6 months to 3 or so years), would the perception of Betas be different?Actually, in terms of long-term monogamous relationships, betas' relationships/marriages do tend to last longer than Alphas, since Alphas aren't capable of long-term monogamy (without eventually cheating anyway). Of course these long-lasting beta relationships aren't very happy, but they do tend to last longer than what most hardcore Alphas are capable of (because of the Needy Alpha insistence on getting into monogamous relationships when they know damn well they won't work for them long term). So as you can see, the problem isn't just with betas, it's also with Needy Alphas. However since there are way, way more betas in society than Needy Alphas, we/I tend to harp on betas a little more often.
Mike 2013-03-07 13:56:47
This post was life-changing. AMAZING to see it in video!
Felix 2016-02-07 08:55:15
You know I'm not so sure it's just societal programming. Sure there is a huge dose of that but you don't see this type of cognitive dissonance in any other animal. Societal programming is there because it is what we wish we could have. That is incredibly powerful. The problem is that we also have instincts that evolved and those instincts don't necessarily make logical sense. If the world was purely logical we would have strong pair bonding. Sex would be wonderful and great with that one special person for the rest of your life. However, that is not very survivable so we, like other animals, have a tendency to procreate and spread our DNA around to ensure the survival of the species which is not conducive to the best interest of the individual. Some of that societal programming is there because we want it to be there. We want to have a woman available and be faithful to you, too bad nature could care less. So we have this pull in two different directions. The problem comes in when we only think there is one way to do things. This is where societal programming or peer pressure comes in and cause problems. People generally want simple answers. This provides a simple answer and it fulfills the fantasy of one man one woman, wait for it...forever. But real life isn't a fantasy but people still want that fantasy. Even without societal programming, people would still want that fantasy. That fantasy came about because we are seriously flawed creatures. Yes women lie to themselves but that is just human nature. Men lie to themselves. People just don't like reality. Or rather most people don't like reality so instead of living with things as they are, we try to change it and when we can't, we lie to ourselves about it. Chicken or the egg? Societal programming or flawed human nature?