In preparation for The Ultimate Open Marriage Manual and Video Course coming out on May 28th, here is an overview on how to protect your hard-earned money when you are married to or live with a woman full time. Click here to register for a free online training I’m doing at noon PST on Thursday May 28th where I will cover OLTR Marriage techniques in more detail.
The non-monogamous aspect of the OLTR Marriage is only half of it. Yes, it’s extremely important that you retain the basic human right to have mutually consensual sex with any woman you want, whenever you want, without having to “check in” with anyone, even if you move in with your girlfriend or marry your wife. Long-term sexual monogamy doesn’t work and you were never designed for such a ridiculous concept (and neither was she). You’re just asking for huge problems down the road if you ever attempt to practice or expect such a thing as hundreds of millions of victims of divorce, breakups, and/or cheating can attest.
At the same time, you need to protect your money. Just because a marriage (and if you live full-time with your unmarried girlfriend I still call that a “marriage” since you’re living the lifestyle of a married man) is sexually open doesn’t mean you can’t still encounter the following financial problems:
- You get a divorce from your wife, losing half or more of your assets, plus possible alimony payments.
- Your girlfriend leaves you, moves out, and sues you for palimony.
- You or your girlfriend moves out and now you are suddenly forced to sell your house to pay her half because you co-own it.
- You or your girlfriend moves out and now one of you are suddenly forced to get a loan from the bank to buy out the other person’s half of the house because you co-own it.
- Your girlfriend moves out and now you can’t pay your apartment rent because you relied on her income to pay it. Now you need to move out and break the lease and ruin your credit score.
- Your wife defaults on one of her debts and the creditors start coming after you because you’re married to her.
- Your wife somehow screws up her taxes and the government comes after you because you’re married to her.
- Your girlfriend or wife overdrafts one of your shared checking accounts because she was irresponsible and now you have to pay the bank to bring the account back to zero because she “doesn’t get paid until next month.”
- One of your girlfriend/wife’s kids (your step kid) gets into trouble that costs hundreds or even thousands of dollars and now you have to pony up the cash to fix it.
- Americans only: Your girlfriend/wife, who eats pretty much whatever she wants, drinks whatever she wants, never exercises, and possibly even smokes or does drugs gets hit with a major but preventable health problem that her health insurance doesn’t cover and now you need to foot the bill even though you’ve taken the effort to be as healthy as possible to prevent these very expenses.
- Your girlfriend/wife gets into some kind of car accident or similar problem that insurance either doesn’t cover or only covers a small percentage of, and now you need to foot the rest of the bill to fix the car.
- Your girlfriend/wife or recent ex-girlfriend/wife steals money from you by taking it right out of a joint account or one of your accounts she has access to.
- Your girlfriend/wife doesn’t exactly steal the money from you but she pulls it out of your account (or a joint account) without your permission because “it was an emergency” and she “didn’t have time to call you.”
- And on, and on, and on.
If you think these are rare and unusual problems, you are dead wrong. These are normal, regular, common issues that arise with the vast, vast majority of marriages and/or co-habiting couples all over the Western world. They are so common that most married men just expect them and put up with them because Societal Programming tells them “that’s part of being married” or “that’s what being married is all about.”
If you are a high-end multi-millionaire with a high six or seven figure income and have no problem constantly whipping out cash to deal with minor and major financial problems caused by your wife or live-in girlfriend, then no worries, feel free to do whatever you want. I know a few high-end rich married guys like this, and they don’t seem to mind because of their unlimited funds.
But if you’re a normal guy living in the real world and you’re seeking the Alpha Male 2.0 goal of long-term consistent happiness, then you simply cannot expose yourself to high probability of financial chaos if/when you move in with a woman. Beta males and Alpha Male 1.0s who surrender to monogamy are more than welcome to get their wallets raped in divorces, breakups, and girlfriend/wife financial screw-ups, but you need to follow a different path.
Under an OLTR Marriage, your money is 100% separated from your girlfriend/wife by a Financial Barrier made up of logistical, banking, legal, business, and sometimes international aspects. This Barrier protects you from all of the possible financial problems I listed above, plus many I didn’t list.
The Financial Barrier is made up of these components:
- 100% separate finances.
This means you have no joint accounts, debts, assets, or leases with your girlfriend/wife. From car payments, to checking accounts, to the lease or mortgage, all the way down to the cable bill, everything in your financial life and hers is either in your name or her name, literally nothing is in both of your names.
She has literally no access to any of your assets or accounts and you have none to hers. You don’t co-sign any debts. Everything is 100% separate and remains so for the entirety of the marriage.
If you want to support your wife (because she’s a stay-at-home mom raising the kids or whatever), you can do that, but that still means you don’t co-own any accounts or assets with her.
- An ENFORCEABLE prenuptial agreement or the equivalent.
It is probably not called a “prenuptial agreement” where you live and the specific names of these contracts vary based on the state, province, or country, but whatever it’s called, it’s a contract that ensures you don’t have to pay her alimony or “half” of what you own in case of any breakup or divorce. You have this well in place long before she moves in and/or any wedding takes place.
The problem is that these contracts are not enforceable in most parts of the Western world. You can get them, and attorneys will happily take your money by selling them to you, but if you actually get divorced the judge will just throw them out. If you live in places like California, Australia, or the U.K. and you want something enforceable, you’re out of luck. You need to either move or never live with a woman.
This means that if you want to protect your finances, you need to live in a place where you can get an enforceable prenuptial agreement, then actually get one, and do it correctly.
- Being really, really nice.
You need to set up daily, weekly, and/or monthly systems with your live-in girlfriend/wife to manage your separate finances in a way that doesn’t make her feel weird or unloved.
When it comes to finances in a marriage, women tend to be communists. As soon as she moves in she will instantly assume that the entire home, everything in it, and all the money she owns and you own will be all “ours,” 50/50 you/her. Of course, that doesn’t make any logical sense, but it doesn’t matter. Her mother, grandmother, girlfriends, Hollywood, Disney, her bullshit religion, and all other sources of false Societal Programming have told her throughout her entire life that 50/50 is how marriage works, so that’s what she assumes.
So obviously, when you start outlining the above systems she’s not going to like it. This means you need to be caring, loving, and understanding… while enforcing a 100% separation of finances. You need to regularly engage with her so that this “weird” way of being married doesn’t make her feel any less of a girlfriend or wife or priority in your life. An OLTR Marriage is asking a lot of a woman, so you need to be really cool about this.
- Asset protection.
Separate finances and an enforceable prenuptial agreement likely aren’t enough to protect you completely, and the more money you make or have the more this is true.
This means you need asset protection. Through the legal use of corporations, LLCs, trusts, and offshoring your investments, you can ensure your money is protected. Asset protection doesn’t mean hiding your assets; you disclose everything you need to disclose to your girlfriend/wife and/or your government to make sure everything is legal and enforceable. You just need to make sure those assets will be impossible for your wife/girlfriend/government to access in the case of a divorce or break-up.
The Ultimate Open Marriage Manual and Video Course is available on May 28th for just four days. Click here to register for a free online training I’m doing at noon PST on Thursday May 28th when we launch the book and the video course where I will cover OLTR Marriage techniques in great detail.